Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Not Your Mother's Guide to Pregnancy and Motherhood

(I will admit, I did, in fact, rip the title of this post off of my sister-in-law's blog.  And I give her full credit.)

My mom and sister recently pitched an idea that I should write a book about pregnancy and the first year in the life of one's baby.  It would be good.  HOWEVER, I have a problem with lengthy writing and I don't know how well a 15 to 30 page "book" would sell.  The full title of the book would be:

Not Your Mother's Guide to Pregnancy and Motherhood:  What the Doctor Never Told You But The Nurse May Have

I only go lengthy on title.  It just exacerbates the problem if your title is only three words shorter than the actual work...I've thought of some chapter titles:  Two for Tuesday (it would outline the perks of having a child), Marathon Birth (it would compare birth to running a marathon...much much harder as a marathon does not leave you with a 6 week recovery, the need for stitches and a stomach that equates itself to a bowl full of jelly.  If it did when you ran one we need to talk about your training program.)

That's basically all I have.  Titles and no stuffing.  Plus, the main thing I would wrestle with is how to come across light and funny while emphasizing the weight of having a baby (no pun intended).  By weight, I mean I also want to convey how wonderful and challenging it is to be a parent, beginning while your child is in utero (hopefully not the Nirvana album).  I would want people to laugh, be informed and also moved.  I think I need to pick one.  It just figures that I can't do anything without having a major identity crisis.

Oh, one other title was It Figures (about pregnant body changes.  I think I got the title from an early 90's work out by Charlene Prickett.  We also have copyright issues abounding.)  And the ever non-creative chapter called Mom Brain which chronicles becoming more and more like your own mother every day as one forgets random things but remembers them 4 hours later when putting dirty clothes in the dishwasher or trying to program the DVR with remote to the DVD player.

Publishers?  Anybody?  I'll sell you my ideas!


PS - it's creeping up on the time that I only do posts about Fall!  Get excited!

Monday, September 3, 2012

I am Humanity and They are Me.

(English major, I am not.  But possibly Yoda's understudy.)

Everyone makes the realization at some point in his or her adult life that people can no longer be divided into neat and nice categories.  When I attended college, those in the parental category resided in a completely different box than I.  When in high school, I lived miles away from my parents' neighborhood, figuratively speaking of course.  I thought everyone would always stay clearly defined, mostly by the contents of the box in which they were placed.

Not exactly the case anymore.

It starts with the realization that there's really not a magic door leading to "your life."  It has always been going on.  It goes back to your first kiss, the numerous trips to the library, climbing trees, playing tricks on your sister...I didn't know there would never be a moment I'd look back on and say, "that is the moment I crossed over into adulthood."


I thought it would happen.

That my fairy godmother would appear in a dream, looking like Meryl Streep in some ridiculous vapor form, and hit me with a magic wand that imparts wisdom and a great womanly figure.  I would wake up and be moved into the parent/adult category.

No.  Instead, I while cooking supper one day, I thought about my grandmother doing the same thing over and over, many days of her life, and made the realization that my grandparents are people.  My mom has a story outside of me and my sister.  People I have looked to in my life for wisdom and direction lived with passions and real feelings.

These "adults".....they are in the same category as me.

And everyone else.  Even my baby girl.

Then, later that week, I also realized that I'm not just connected to my family in this way, but I'm connected to humanity in this way also and every way possible.  (by "later that week" I mean I have no idea when I was thinking about this.)  I'm not the only one that has felt the exhilaration of completing a run, who has felt the pleasure and gratification of a job well done.  I'm not the first person to understand the gravity of a life long commitment and relish the fact that my spouse and I love and respect one another after going through life together for a decade.  I'm not the first mother and certainly not the first person to love and be loved; to hurt and inflict pain.  To be.

And compared to older and wiser souls, I don't know what the hell I'm doing.  But I hope that some day I'll be considered wise and will have the pleasure of watching my own children figure this out for themselves.  Maybe my husband and I will even be able to discuss it over a nice cup of coffee on the back porch while our grandchildren frolic in the yard.  And my children will hold me in high regard because I will be well traveled, wildly funny and an extremely good cook; not to mention as wise as Grandmother Willow.  Pretty much everything covered in Proverbs 31.

Cheers, to you, humanity.  Until next time!

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Mommy Math

Week two of half training plus a baby who thinks 2:00am to 4:00am is optimal play time multiplied by part time advising divided by a 6:00am alarm clock equals one hot triple grande toffee nut latte from Starbucks.

The quantity of the number of daily dishwasher cycles plus the times I fold clothes each week squared, divided by "x" equals the number of hours I get to adore my sweet girl. Solve for "x" when x=y+1. (y is the number of time ls my dear husband went to HEB for me).

I would do an equation about how the crowd at HEB has grown exponentially with the arrival of students to College Station but it would make my head explode. And it's already going to pop because one little corgi, who shall remain nameless, is standing on the back porch barking her tiny head off.

Well, the number of times said baby has been awakened by that corgi has just gone up, so I must leave you.

Cheers! 'til next time!

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Peach Pickin' Paradise

Bugs attacking. Sweat rolling. People laughing. Baskets swaying. Dust flying. Car bouncing. Peach fuzz sticking. Competition threatening. Bartons winning. Peaches piling. People eating. Peach juice rolling. Family loving!

Monday, June 25, 2012


How have I not shared my encounter with the bird?

Lately, when jogging by our corner convenience store, which, by the way, I swear off every time I go in.  Why do I swear it off?  Because the convenience store got with The Man and decided to not post prices on any of the goods for sale in the store.  Well, I'm assuming its all for sale, but who could really tell with no pricing?  They have a "policy" that you may not charge anything under $2 on your credit card.  My natural inclination is to pick up the cheapest nearby object and waste more money just to hit the $2 mark - a great strategy if anything had pricing!  Half the time I pick something that ends up being $3+ and then they win.  I suggested they just add the amount to my tab that would total up to $2, but they weren't going to be tricked into that.  Just to get even I've started not buying items that don't hit the mark by abandoning my transaction at the register.  Nicely, of course.  They want to play games with me?  BOOM

So, back to lately.  Lately they have hired a bird to dive-bomb my head as I jog by on the sidewalk.  This relentless bird swoops down from the electric line when you least expect it, and also right as you meet a biking fool who takes great joy in watching/laughing as you freak out like a spaz, screaming and flailing your arms.

No matter how traumatized I am by the attack, I seem to forget to not go that way and it happens all over again.

And again.

No matter the time of day.

'til next time!

Thursday, June 21, 2012

What Doesn't Kill You....

Almost kills you.

I'm trying to get back into running...try being the operative word.  With 95% humidity and hotter than I would prefer temperatures to deal with, I feel like an insane person upon venturing out for a run.  I have to figure something out, though.  I have committed and signed up for the Run for Adoption in October and will be signing up for another half in late November or early December.


I will try to conjure up some interesting posts between now and my scheduled death.

Until then...

Monday, May 14, 2012

Lifetime Supply of GUM TOOTHBRUSHES!

I feel frightened because my husband speaks of a certain toothbrush with love and adoration, describing it as an "intimate tool."  GUM toothbrushes are good, maybe I don't care as much as I should about oral hygiene, but it just seemed like a regular old toothbrush to me.

I'm frightened that tomorrow I'm going to get a delivery of a lifetime supply of GUM toothbrushes....apparently local retailers don't carry these amazing tooth cleaners.  An order is being placed for this very household as I type.

Don't think I wouldn't use half of the lifetime supply.  (Maybe they are slightly better than other brands.)

I have to go brush my teeth now.  And floss.....now that I've been thinking about tooth care for 15+ minutes.

Cheers!  To clean teeth.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Boom Shakalaka

Here are a few tidbits/state of the Sanchez update:

Still watching Grey's all afternoon.

Still remembering that I am thankful for the job I've been provided that allows me to work from home and see my beautiful baby girl grow and learn so much every day.  Do you realize that the line between regular blogging and work blogging blurs completely because of this?  Am I working or blogging?  No one is sure.

Still staring in wonder at baby girl, who from this point forward shall be referred to as BG, as her big blue eyes stare back with complete trust and unconditional love (she is the best thing we have ever done).

Still trying to straighten my arms out without pain in my elbow pits because I'm so sore from doing the 30 day shred, even though that workout is so two years ago.  This in combination with running is brutal.  But in a good way.

Still photo-documenting BG's every move excessively.  Seriously.  It's quite excessive.  I have 1300 pictures stored on my iPhone.

Most importantly....I'm still wondering WHY my husband asked me how to spell "boom shakalaka."

PS - my amazing friends started an adoption blog and I really am still moved by their unfailing commitment to the Lord and his plan for their lives.


Monday, April 23, 2012

Making Room

Why are we so attached to stuff? I found myself looking around my house today looking for some things to donate to a garage sale to raise money for a mission trip, wondering how I acquired so much and why I feel the need to keep it all.

I piled up a whole dining room table full of this stuff and can't even tell a difference in my house. It made no dent. None. Ridiculous.

I am taking a brief blog break because I caught myself going to the attic to get everything-if it's up there WHY do I feel the need to keep all this crap?! (with the exception of Christmas decor, which is sacred and holy...that stays).

I recognize my other half will need to give his opinion before I tell them to take everything, even the dishes. But my goal is now to get rid of as much as possible....because I'm making room!! (for what....that's to be determined)

I'll keep you posted on the status of the purge of the meaningless sanchez junk. (WHY do we have 200 CDs...they are all on our iTunes.) (WHY do I have 7 curtain rods in the closet) (WHY do we have 45 coffee cups)

If its not nailed down...it's gone.

'til next time! (which may be a while. Chances of getting rid of the computer and cell phone are high right now!)

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Return of the Mother

So, I've been MIA for a while, but I was just busy with my sweet baby girl who is now TWO MONTHS OLD.  Two whole months.  And I have loved every single moment of her little life.  Seeing a tiny person with the best parts of you and your spouse makes life seem so simple and pure.  I love it!  I love being a mother.  (especially because I can watch Grey's Anatomy for approximately 3 hours every day).

Also...I started running again.  It's been rough.  I currently have a love/hate relationship with running.  It's mostly hate right now.  Running needs to send me flowers and chocolates so we can make up.  My goal is to get back together with running before November when I plan to run the DRC half, but we are talking to other people right now.  I hope running doesn't get jealous of yoga....They can have each other when I swear off exercising all together.

I'm off to see just how much I can make a certain little girl smile and giggle.

Until next time!

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Small Town Girl

It's a good indication that I am what some might label as "small town" when the news of the opening of a  new Panera Bread in the B/CS area is the most exciting thing I've heard all week.  Feeble attempts to wake up this morning were made in the form of reading the news online, answering emails (yes, working.  shocking, I know) and even drinking coffee.  The venti CAS my coworker brought me this morning significantly improved the chances of both a great day and being fully awake by 11:00am (even though my work day starts at 7:00....).  but I was jolted from my semi coma and brought into reality at the wondrous mention of this glorious event.

(Those of you who do not frequent Starbucks often enough to know what a CAS is, I'll help you out.  Caramel Apple Spice.  Try it.  It, too, is glorious.  It's difficult to pinpoint which drink wins my heart the most, but this one has been in the top three for a number of years.)

In other disturbing news, I noticed that I wasted a total of almost 4 entire minutes on the commute home yesterday trying to decide on the thermostat setting of the AC in the car.  I interrupted my own nerdy thoughts once I realized that I only wanted it to be set on an even number or multiple of 3 or 5....NEVER a prime number.  And at that point the thought of my new daughter and loving husband next to me was all that kept me from veering off the road.

(The person who enters my vehicle and sets my thermostat on 67 degrees I WILL hunt down.)

I envision the perfect spring day, driving to Panera Bread with sweet little Mattie in the back seat (thermostat set on a nice round 70 or even 68).

Until next time!  Cheers!

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Adventures Involving Red Box

After taking painstaking care to find a parking place without being run off the road plus positioned for easy escape, I hurriedly grabbed both redbox rental returns and my keys and run-walked to the redbox in front of Kroger.

I dodged runaway carts and vehicles, barely making it to my destination in one piece. I hit "return" and inserted my movie, only to have it thrust right back at me with the message: "error returning your disk. Make sure the logo is facing you."

Second try. Same results. The logo was most definitrly facing me. Clearly there was a problem with the redbox. After try number three, I got angry and moved to the other redbox and successfully returned my second rental before trying a fourth time to return the difficult one. Once more I got the error.

Because I was returning an empty case.

I've turned into my mother.

Until next time!

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Resolution, Schmesolution

The Sanchez family set one resolution:  be on time to work.  It's already been back-burnered.  I'm working on setting another one.  But I just feel like I want to live this year like each day was the only day I ever got to live, and I think that is enough.

We'll go resolution-less.  Cheers to Y.O.B!  (Year of baby.)

Until next time!

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Snookie Tails

Mom asked me to guest blog for her because she obviously lacks motivation to do posts....Exhibit A: the 12 posts of Christmas-ish total one; tomorrow is the last day of Christmas.  I came into the Sandidge family almost a year ago.  It's usually what mom calls "shenanigans" but it's more like fun.  At first I was opposed to being paraded around on a string tied around my head, but now I see that it's a good way to explore the neighborhood.  Dad even lets me off the leash at the big field so I can chase things.  That's my favorite.

Christmas was fun.  I got new chew toys; specifically a blue squeaky bone whose magnificence almost frightens me.  It was almost as fun as Thanksgiving when I nearly caught a cat in the neighbor's barn when we visited Oklahoma.  Mom killed the fun, though.  She freaked out and started running after us and yelling.  It's kind of a blur because all I could think about was sprinting after said cat.  It was kind of nice to be carried all the way back to Grammy's house, even though I think I may have been being lectured on the way back.

The Christmas tree is gone, which had become my favorite place to lounge at home when inside.  I'll have to settle for the couch. 

Well, I'm off to chase birds in the backyard.

- Snookie Sandidge