Wednesday, December 3, 2014

O Christmas Tree

Well, not to be redundant on intro BUT it's been such a long time since writing that I forgot how to log in to this thing.  Maybe that was because of my lack of patience which I seem to have used up during the 45 minute ordeal in which I tried to reason with my toddler regarding acceptable Christmas Tree Ornament Etiquette.  "Is this a thing?" you ask.  Well - lots of non-things become things when trying to reason with a two year old.  (oxy-moron).

Old book ideas - abandoned; New book idea for toddlers:  Acceptable Christmas Tree Ornament Etiquette for Toddlers.  Fully illustrated with diagrams for easy understanding!  Special section on "Why It Seems Ok to Ignore Your Mommys' Instructions Because You Are Wailing On The Couch."  (true part of my story...I left the room I wouldn't begin my own fit of rage and heard crying from the living room ongoing for 20 minutes.  At the conclusion of said 20 minutes I had collected myself (because I'm the adult here, right?!) and calmly and serenely indicated that it was now time to fix hair.  My daughters defeated and sniffly response was "no,  I'm still crying on the couch.")

Other sections:

1) Basic Tree Rules: Only Look With Eyes
2) Throwing Ornaments Is Not Kind
3) Climbing Is Never OK (But laying on the tree skirt under the tree may be)

It would be a best seller, amiright.  The only prerequisite knowledge required of the toddler market is how to read.  Shockingly enough, when typing "teach your toddler to....." into the google bar, one of the first things that pops up is "read."

Good.  We're all ready for this.

I actually felt happy to be going to Wal-Mart after these exciting events...all my SAHMs, can I get an amen?  At least to make me feel better?  I'm trying to get a feel for the market of my new book here...

(Oh my, yes things get a little dramatic around here but that is to be expected out of such an expressive and otherwise delightful 2.5 year old.  Kids keep things interesting and certainly never boring.)

And I hope everyone relating to this is now enjoying a peaceful moment this afternoon, as I am.  Mint green tea and kindle in hand I wish you Happy Naptime.  Cheers!