Tornadoes Are a North American Phenomenon

Or so Ben, my car guy, tells me. If hurricanes occurred in the southern hemisphere, they’d spin counter-clockwise.

Life is weird. I can pick up knowledge about random things in the strangest of places; learn from the most unexpected events. I can be exceedingly happy and grateful over something that can morph into my biggest source of stress. Living miles and miles away from my loved ones can make my heart ache but can also cause seeing family that much more sweet. Bad things happen to good people, and vice-versa. And no one understands, least of all me.

I guess there is a season for everything. I wish there wasn't. But that wouldn't make everything work the same way, would it?

Everything is made of peanut butter. I’m trusting that God knows what he’s doing.

Until next time…

PS-I’m still training for the half, I will be employed officially on Thursday, and I still have the same pair of sunglasses I got around Easter this year. I’m doing something right.

Take that, cosmos.

Cinnamon Toast

And by toast, I mean unidentifiable, charred remains of once fluffy bread.

Picture it: Smoke fills the air, a woman, cute hair, butter on her sweatshirt, briskly opens the silverware drawer, which also has butter in it. Cue smoke alarm. The oven opens. The woman's husband runs around the apartment, fanning the air with his snuggie. The blackened pieces of cinnamon toast find their rightful place in the trash can.

Yep. This may or may not have been my Saturday morning...Cooking adventures cease not!

Why yes. I do eat oatmeal out of a serving bowl.

Please note: I was not in anyway looking down on people who make bucket lists in my post yesterday. I just wanted to point out that merely having a list of things to do and doing them, does not accomplish true living. Setting goals pushes people toward their dreams, of which I am a huge advocate.

What are my goals, you ask. To never hear Harry Conic, Jr. sing again. The rest remain undisclosed. I'll let you know when I have achieved one. Let's start with one I achieved this morning: eat a large amount of oatmeal with pecans and brown sugar. Check!

Until next time!

The Un-Bucket List

Everyone seems to be making Bucket Lists. Don't get me wrong, I'm Planning Ahead's number one fan, but sitting down to do a list of things sort of takes the excitement out of it for me today. I started this post intending to write my bucket list, but it seemed lame. What matters to me is not hiking Mt. Everest, seeing the Great Wall, or surfing off the coast of Australia, which are all things that would have been on said Bucket List, except I reject Bucket Listing. I would, instead, like to wake up every day and be happy with what I have and who I have with me on this journey called life. I want to feel completely filled up with goodness because I have relationships with people and family and take note of the small things, where ever I am.

I contemplated writing a list of Things I Don't Want to Do Before I Die but that seemed sort of negative. We all know Karma is watching me, so I went ahead and deleted that. Also, mainly, it seemed hard to take seriously. Possibly because it contained items such as: clean the oven, do laundry, buy dairy from the HEB in College Station. (The bottom line is that I complain A LOT and probably have a permanent un-Buckety List running through my brain at all times, while many people in this world would be more than happy with my living conditions and in my shoes! I mean, I have a bad-ass collection of shoes, to be sure. This is what really matters in life....)

The Un-Bucket List could be the result of me perpetually wanting to not be like everyone else, damn the man, etc. Either that or I'm on to something. What I do know is that I went to get my hair cut at a funky salon in The Heights (with a vibe that, to me, says Tim Burton meets hair salon meets 100 scary mannequin heads.) I found in this place a guy getting his hair cut who has been traveling the world for 10 months. He's from Australia and is just out, traveling around. He hit up Europe and the came to the old US of A to visit some family. How awesome is that?! I am willing to place a wager that he doesn't blog his bucket list - he is out LIVING and DOING. I aspire to be such.

So......Until next time!

I'll be blogging it up in approximately 10 months!

PS-Just kidding. The main point of the Un-Bucket List is that it doesn't matter where I am or what sights I'm seeing. This is very peanut-buttery and more relational for me. The Un-Bucket List Concept includes sightseeing, but doesn't have a foundation there. It most likely involves a bunch of break dancing and maybe surfing. And mainly people!

It's a Family Thing

Sarcastic humor has existed in my family for generations-A gift passed down to sons and daughters by loving parents. I take no responsibility for my actions. I merely am. I must own it. Work it. To do anything else would be an insult to my great grandfather.

Cheers, Papaw!

Goodbye, Books

Kindle, Nook and iPad: you are killing printed books. I shudder at the thought of not being able to hold a book, turn it's pages, let my tears fall on the print and dog-ear my stopping point. As my mom so simply stated, "part of the pleasure of reading is holding the book." Reading, which has been done the same way for a very long time, faces a huge makeover. Will it be the end of print as we know it?!

Am I the only one getting sentimental here? I also have a fond and extreme attachment to physical mail. Don't get me wrong, e-mail excites me just as much. However, I harbor resentment when e-mail activity interferes with the number of articles I receive in my actual mailbox. Laying eyes on a note someone wrote to me with their own hand just cannot be matched with impersonal black and white staring at me from a computer screen.

Does the efficiency of e-books and increasing accessibility of communication through email trump the feeling and experience brought on by physically holding a book and reading a hand-crafted note? I personally feel as though electronic everything makes all of the aforementioned impersonal, cold and depresses the hell out of me!

I confess, however, that I have yet to read using anything other than an actual book. As part of my research on this topic, I will need to obtain a Kindle, Nook or iPad. Quite possibly all three. Until the research is complete, I will hold on to my sentimental ways, clutching my book, newspaper and greeting cards while lounging on the couch reading from my Kindle.....the picture may not convey my point. I will be clutching the book, newspaper and greeting cards while reading from my Kindle but also, at the same time, saying, "Viva la books!" And then maybe switching to my iPad, which is also programmed to turn off my lights remotely. I will probably also use my laptop to blog and email, and also to read blogs and bank online. I may not need to use the iPad to turn off the lights because I may never have to leave the house. I can buy anything and everything online, such as books, clothes etc. and have them shipped right to my doorstep. Technology wins and effectively eliminates the need to interact with people, go to work or live out in the actual world, where the books are. Making these hypothetical purchases are the best thing that ever happened and will probably revolutionize my way of living.

Until next time!

PS-I don't think I will be able to stay home and use my iphone, laptop or Kindle to cut my hair. Whew. Glad I found that loophole. I guess I will need to keep buying real books after all.

Craziness aside, what I'm wondering is: Does the medium through which a person gains knoweldge, books, cards, newspaper vs. Kindle, e-mail, online etc., help determine how a person feels and what he or she takes away from the experience? Does it really matter how we get ideas, facts and information? Will print eventually die and does it matter?

Did someone plant things in my head electronically while I was checking my email? Or while I was asleep? Should I have watched Inception?

I Win

I watched seven hours of America's Next Top Model today. SEVEN HOURS. And I've been awake since 2am. Why? You ask. Because I jolted awake and then watched infomercials about Zoomba and the movie Up. Up is the reason I didn't go back to sleep. It sucked me in, plus made me cry. I like to watch children's movies. I have no shame. Things started seeing freakishly clear around 6pm today. But now that it's 8pm, not so clear. Lack of sleep? Lack of general concern? I'm out to run a bit, seeing as I've run a grand total of none this week.

Some people may look at my past two crazy days and think that I lost. I started the day yesterday with three potential and probable job offers and ended with none. I look at them and think that I won. In the long run I have been spared the agony of working in a truly unprofessional and unpleasant atmosphere, and that counts for a lot. Also? How many people can say that they have lost three jobs in one day? I win. I'll add that to my resume.


Furthermore, my day this morning started with a stakeout. I can't give you anymore details than that. Just picture Jerry Seinfeld and George Costanza spying on someone in a really inconspicuous way. I'll give you one guess as to who was playing George this morning. (Me. The paranoia is back....you know. The paranoia where the I'm George and my life is Seinfeld) Doing the stake out was quite amusing and informative, in a totally non-creepy, stalking way. Win again.

Don't worry. I'll keep my ear to the grindstone, as Ben Afleck so eloquently put it in one of my all-time favorite moves, Good Will Hunting. By that I mean, I may do some fictional writing posts later. or not. Either way, you can anticipate what's next, and, regardless*, I win. Please take note, masses: irregardless isn't a word. (not to indicate that I think I'm being followed on this thing by the masses.)

Until then!

PS-Apparently irregardless is a word, according to spellcheck, who wanted to change Zoomba to Zambia, which would have probably made for a much more interesting infomercial.

*Maybe I should clarify that irregardless shouldn't be used here, rather than saying it's not a word. Maybe it is a word. I can't think of any time it would be of acceptable use. I don't know much about grammar. I'll ask my cute little English Majoring sister.